Winging Life Since 1995

Wednesday, 28 December 2016

Our Home


One day we're going to buy an empty house and have nothing but a mattress to our names. As the days go by we'll buy bits and bobs we like. While we're waiting for the wifi to set up we'll go to the nearest coffee shop with our laptops and I'll write and we'll buy a big bed and a desk and maybe a lamp and some shutters, perhaps an ottoman and a load of cushions and they’ll arrive and we'll put them wherever we want. There will be earthy tones and browns and creams and dusty roses then bright tapestries on the floor and walls, with sofas to match. Fairy lights will line the walls and our gramophone will blast out vinyl classics that are picked from the bookshelf that's packed full of music and words. The smell of candles will spread around the room sweetening the empty space, swirling around all the huge green plants making our private rainforest. Draped across our four poster bed the white sheer silk curtain will sway from the fresh breeze coming from the double balcony doors and I will start writing those words to get lost in on a rusty typewriter while hoping one day we'll be listening to the pitter patter of tiny feet playing.

Photo: @simply_kenna
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Sunday, 25 December 2016

IT'S NEARLY OVER | 2016 Round-Up


I think everyone on and off the Internet can agree that 2016 has been a serious game changer. My 2016 was the year I figured out more about myself and took my adult responsibilities seriously (to a certain degree... *cough* McDonald's daily *cough*.)


I set myself a challenge to see if I could summarise my entire year in once sentence. And I did.
Disclaimer - the following may or may not be grammatically correct as the semicolon is the scariest of punctuation.


We’re starting with January when my girlfriend and I moved in together in London to eat lots of pizza and chocolate yoghurts which was exactly what we consumed on our year anniversary in February; added with yet another Big Easy lobster feast, the place where I had my last team outing as I got promoted to a Digital Marketing Executive that sucked and I cried every day into my colouring book for three weeks when I worked as a newsletter builder and marketing bitch with a glorified title, which happened to spark a relapse in a chronic illness that haunted the entire of my teenage years forcing me to take a month off and return back to my original position in March, where by this point I’d already had around five different hair colours that continued through April and May (months I never remember, perhaps after mentally blocking them out due to cutting a fringe,) however, in June my girlfriend and I took our second romantic holiday of the year to Santorini (the first to The Lake District) and watched some of the most breathtaking sunsets that we desperately tried to hold onto after returning to the monstrosity that was Brexit just before July’s English “heatwave”, following into August where I spent my time counting down the seconds until I handed in my notice and left my job; as well as selling 60% of my belongings online that ultimately funded food cravings that I had in September when I left England (on a flight that’s given me dodgy knees) to spend a year travelling around Australia to meet amazing people and visit places that included Fraser Island, Whitsundays Islands and the now dead Great Barrier Reef to name a few, to then suddenly realise after turning 21 in October that I was living somebody else's dream and returned home to Bristol in November (still as pale as before) to mourn the money I had spent and to get my life on track ready for my new job I started in December and Christmas festivities that consume you, leading to a sudden epiphany (learning the the hard way), two weeks before December 25th, otherwise known as the day where you eat the most food ever, that I’m lactose intolerant and milk is literally in everything, so really if you mix in a couple of anxiety attacks, empty bank accounts and that one visit to the gym, it was a crazy year.



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Wednesday, 21 December 2016

Mince-less Mince Pies | Apple & Pecan

I hate mince pies. Every year I try these beautiful little things and I pretty much spit them out each time. It’s the same with Christmas Cake and Christmas Pudding. Bleh. So this year, I decided to make my own mincemeat-less mince pies that still incorporates the smells and flavours that Christmas is all about... And mainly so I could stuff my face that little bit more.

Now I’m recently lactose intolerant (*cries*) this recipe is also dairy free!



Apple, Cinnamon & Pecan Mince Pie Ingredients:
Makes 12-18 Mince Pies

  • Shortcrust Pastry Block / Sheet
  • 3 cooking apples
  • 60g pecans
  • 40g + 3tbsp caster sugar
  • 1tbsp lemon juice
  • ½ tsp ground cinnamon
  • Pinch of nutmeg
  • 1 beaten egg

Instructions:

1. Preheat your oven to 180℃. Grease 2 bun trays with a butter alternative spread of your choice. I used Pure Dairy & Gluten Free Sunflower Spread.


2. Toast the pecans on a medium heat for a few minutes and then place them on a plate. In the same pan, take 3tbsp of golden caster sugar and spread evenly to caramelise. This can take a few minutes so keep an eye on it. Do not stir or turn up the heat while the sugar is in the pan as it can cause the sugar to burn. Once all the sugar crystals are no longer visible, slowly tip the pan to completely cover the base in the caramel. Toss the pecans in the caramel to cover them and then return them back to the plate to cool. If you are peckish and want one now - don’t! You’ll burn your tongue and regret it.


3. Peel the apples, slice into four pieces and remove the core, otherwise it will be nasty. Place the apples and pecans into a food processor and pulse until it’s a fine looking mixture. This is how it will go into the pastry so pulse it as much or as little as you want.

4. Tip the mixture into a mixing bowl to mix in the remaining sugar, cinnamon, nutmeg and lemon juice. Be careful with the lemon juice if you have any open wounds. If you feel your mixture is too watery just drain it slightly with a sieve.

5. Cut out 18 circles from your rolled pastry that are larger than your tray holes and place them inside the holes (you know the drill.) With the remaining pastry, use a fun Christmas shaped cutter to cover the tops.


6. Spoon out your mixture into the tray holes, top your pies and brush with a beaten egg.

7. Bake for 20-25 minutes until the tops are golden. Cool on a wire rack and then tuck in.



Based on Lay The Table’s recipe.
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Sunday, 18 December 2016

45 Thoughts I Had on the Tube


  1. I'm having a hot flush omg.
  2. I'm burning up up up, I'm burning up up up, I'm burning up up up, I'm on fire!
  3. Shit. Should not have stood in the corner. 
  4. Hello I'm standing here!
  5. I'm like jelly on a plate.
  6. He did not just fart...
  7. *Frantically checks if vents are open*
  8. Coat on, coat off, coat on, coat off.
  9. I'm falling all over the place.
  10. Werk werk werk werk werk.
  11. Make up. Melting.
  12. BITCH THAT'S MY SEAT.
  13. She could be pregnant, but she could of had seconds of chicken jalfrezi.
  14. Wibble wobble.
  15. Ladies first but also equality...
  16. Must. Hold. On.
  17. If I put one foot out and twist the other 180 degrees I might be able to stay balanced.
  18. Mmmm you smell nice.
  19. Please don't fall asleep Emily.
  20. *Gets a whiff of armpit*
  21. SASHIMI ROLLIN', THEY HATIN'.
  22. Ugh.
  23. We're only here?! I can't believe there's five whole stops to go.
  24. *Reads same advert twelve times*
  25. *Tries not to stare at boobs opposite*
  26. I think that man will follow me and kill me.
  27. I feel need to dance deep inside.
  28. I SMELL MACDONALDS.
  29. Please kindly remove your backpack from my face. 
  30. Dear God, if I get trampled today please make all the sad animals happy.
  31. *Makes faces in window reflection*
  32. *Realises people are looking*
  33. Those are some futuristic headphones.
  34. It's got none of those cord things.
  35. Sir I can hear your tunes.
  36. *Secretly judges everyone*
  37. What we need is love and world peace.
  38. I'm not hating on you, I just want to know where you got your shoes.
  39. *Catches eyes of person opposite* DO I SMILE?!
  40. Are they looking at me or is it because I just looked at them.
  41. It's been two stops, IT'S BEEN FOREVER.
  42. Did I just sing that it loud?!
  43. I need my bed.
  44. GET OUT MY WAY.
  45. LET ME CROSS MY FINISH LINE.

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Wednesday, 14 December 2016

Be You

Stop what you're doing! Stop it! Stop doing that thing that you feel you should do to fit into that box because it's a waste of time anyway and just BE YOU.

Bet you've never heard that before. Yeah, I know, I get it… You think this is going to be one of those annoying embrace your weird posts and well, you're completely bang on because I'm going to talk about not being afraid to be you.

I wasn't the most popular at school and I'm bloody glad I wasn't. Those poor girls pushing themselves into this “cool” box that had no room for unique personality. Everyone dressed the same, did their hair the same and did the same activities all because they were too afraid that no one would like them if they were different. And honestly, I didn't really like them because I wasn't up for having the same robot conversation with twelve of the same personality. Not that they would talk to me anyway.



BUT, I wasn't really a “geek” either. I didn't fit anywhere and found myself having a great time at home where I was comfortable. My interests are often the opposite of most people and I'm OK with that. I LOVE being weird and enjoying myself because it's so much better than doing something I don't want to do just because everyone else is doing it. Luckily peer pressure has never been a problem for me because I just do not give two shits if you're all downing shots of vodka and I'm drinking ice tea.

I never tried to fit into a box because it was tiresome and boring and it didn't interest me.

I don't care if I don't have evening plans, even on a Friday or Saturday.

I don't care if everyone goes out and I don't feel like it.

I don't care if everyone is reading Twilight and I'm reading some indie lesbian book in the corner of the library.

I don't care if you don't like what I like because I'm still going to like it.
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Wednesday, 7 December 2016

Season Musing's - Winter

I’m going to start off firstly by saying Christmas is the best time of the year.

The transition from Autumn into Winter, when all the dark brown and red leaves that have fallen off the now bare trees get crisp with frost. The hats, gloves and scarves come out, electric blankets and nine pairs of socks too.

The trees, decorations, the lights, the pubs packed with festivity and a happy murmur can be heard as soon as the doors open until the chilly early hours. Smiling happy faces, meeting new people, seeing people you’ve not seen for years, everyone comes together.

The children get excited and the present buying begins. Every day their eager little bodies rush out of bed and throw open the curtains to find out if today was the day that outside is covered in fresh white snow. I still do this sometimes.



Decorating your house becomes a weekend activity blasting out the 2011 Michael Buble Christmas album getting ready for your family to come together. Food is the centre of your attention and the TV Christmas specials are in full speed.

Ice skating becomes everyone’s new favourite hobby and warm log fires are your new favourite smell. Christmas eve, checking the fridge to make sure you’ve left one mince pie for Santa and a carrot for Rudolph ready to put out later tonight by the fireplace so they can have a snack while you're snuggled up in bed.

Christmas day is here and you know it was all worth it. Ready to go again next year.
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